Wednesday, September 07, 2005

National Director of Sexual Harrassment

I want that job. But I only want to train firefighters and workers who have to stay in shape to do their jobs well. I promise an intense one-day seminar on how to avoid sexually harrassing people. It will be very hands-on, with a lot of role playing and chocolate syrup. Could someone pass this along to the higher-ups at FEMA? Thanks.

6 comments:

X said...

Hmm...I don't think those committee meetings will be on CSPAN.

VagabondLoafer said...

If you have any dirt on higher-ups then you can demand your post be elevated to a cabinet level position. At that level you garner more awe and respect from lowly E1~E15 pay grade types – many of whom have been trained to utter the word ‘yes’ after every question posed to them. You are at liberty to grant special favors. Think of all the high-priced political operatives and scapegoats you will have at your disposal. Yes Laura, a leisurely lifestyle awaits you in the service of your country!
Attendance at nightly Whitehouse basement soirees is recommended. After a few Jell-O shooters Condi does a mean Lindy Hop. Don’t forget to ask King Georgie for your free medal at the door.

Effin’ spammers.

Butternut said...

I'm getting a job as a fireman right now. All I need is a dalmatian and I'm set. I already have the rubber pants.

Blog spammers eat babies.

Tim said...

There are very few places left where it is safe to sexually harass someone. Retail environments chief among them; as far as I know it's still legal to say to the girl making your chai (ugh) "if I told you that you had a nice body would you hold it against me?" but I fear time is running out. This may or may not pertain to firefighters.

Any greater sexist message inferred from the sex of the barista in above example is purely coincidental.

Butternut said...

As long as you're not their boss.

Butternut said...

... or their Dad.