It's rare in this day and age that someone achieves a great...um....achievement. So it is with tremendous pride that I salute my dear friend Cecily, who last night entered the annals of Los Angeles history by becoming one of only thousands of people recognized by Tom Bergin's Tavern for their commitment to drink. Only those brave souls who have consumed more than twenty alcoholic beverages at said establishment are able to receive the coveted cardboard shamrock with his or her name on it.
Last night Cecily was so honored. I wept with pride as Cesar, a Bergin employee, stapled Cecily's shamrock to the wall. In one of the booths next to us, three young men cheered and pronounced the occasion "awesome" as they hi-fived my friend, tears of joy--and a little bit of nose snot--running down her face. Other people looked on with feigned disinterest, but you could tell that behind their smiles and pints of Guinness they were seething with jealousy.
My friend's accomplishment is even more amazing when you consider the fact that she only has 1/8th of a liver left in her body, a result of a fishing accident some years ago. There were times we didn't think she was going to make it. On beverage number twelve, for example, she complained of stabbing pains throughout her body, and almost didn't finish her Newcastle. But we spurred her on with chants of "drink! drink! drink!" before she guzzled down the rest and collapsed on the floor. And the little trooper never gave up. She persevered and triumphed.
Cecily, you are an inspiration. Thank you for your courage.