Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I'm Never Using the Internet Again



I don't think Conficker is supposed to affect Macs, but I'm still a little paranoid. My advice? Update your security patches. Withdraw all your cash from the bank and put it in a safe and bury it in the backyard. Cancel all your credit cards. Switch to analog porn. Only purchase food from local ethnic markets. Pay in cash. Create an alternate identity using the birth certificate of a dead guy and open a checking account in his or her name. Never have more than $100 in the fake account.

I will update my advice throughout the day...unless I don't.

3 comments:

D said...

I'm with you on everything, well everything but the Analog Porn. I need my smut nice and clear I'm all about the High Def stuff i want to see every steroid pimple, every track mark, and every surgery scar.... makes for smooooth masturbation

Seaners said...

It's not a computer dealio, it's the operating system thinga-majig. My buddy, Techsupport no.2, is running Widows 7 on his MacBook Pro primarily and he is at risk, "kinda" but people running OSX on their Mac's or PC's aren't. :) It's not a issue of what OS is the best but what OS is worth writing a virus too and Windows has almost all the market share so it be's best for virus programmers.

Sorry bout my grammar, I'm on spring break so enjoying my time away from my clientele...teachers. :-)

Butternut said...

Y2K!!!!!

Conficker details

No worries. No need to get all crazy and stock up on batteries and bottled water. For the love of God don't eat pistachios though. Now that's dangerous.