Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Other White Meat Virus















For some reason, people are continuing to refer to the latest flu outbreak as "Swine Flu", despite the fact that a more accurate name would be H1N1 Virus. The most vociferous opponents of the name "Swine Flu" happen to be U.S. pork producers, who think we should call it "H1N1 Virus". Clearly their marketing department did not give this new name a lot of thought.

Where U.S. pork producers failed, Israeli politicians succeeded. In Israel, they no longer refer to the virus as "Swine Flu", but not because they worry about the fate of pork sales. Israelis deemed the name too offensive because of Jewish and Muslim sensibilities toward pork. They opted for the less-offensive name: "Mexican Influenza."

Surprisingly enough, Mexican officials are not on the same page as their Israeli counterparts. In fact, one Mexican health official, Jose Cordova, thinks we might be jumping the gun in claiming the outbreak originated in Mexico. Said Cordova, "Where did the virus come from? We don't know. Did someone come from California or did someone go from Mexico to California? We don't have that information." Cordova thinks we should call the virus, "Pinche Gringo Flu."

This name business is serious business. Maybe we should come up with some names that EVERYBODY can get behind.

Suggestions?

8 comments:

gijyun said...

Appocolypse Flu

Ann Coulter Syndrome

Happy Fun Time Disease

The Common Cold part deux

ROLFMAO Virus

Or, if swine flu is really too brash, Swish Flu might do?

Skip Serpico said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Skip Serpico said...

(Damn this bloody formatting.)

"Pinche Gringo Flu."Now that put a smile on my face.

Butternut said...

Fluasaurus Rex
Successful and Attractive Flu
Flock of Flugulls
The Brown Plague
Cooties

Laura Swisher said...

These are all very good suggestions.

ROLFMAO Virus is current, would probably get a lot of traction in the media.

And I like that Cooties is old school. Fluasaurus Rex makes me want to get the flu just so I can tell people I have Fluasarus Rex.

As always, great work.

FifthDream said...

I say we call it "Wild Overreaction" or "OMGEVERYBODYRUNWE'REALLGONNADIECUZTHETVSAIDSO!!!!!"

Can you tell i'm bitter? XD

"Z" said...

the freak out flu

shift the focus off the economy virus

post 100 day syndrome

tankboy2902 said...

I can't think of a name but here's the t-shirt:

"I PHUKD THIS PIG AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY FEVER."

Now, many people would put Rosie O'Donnell on it, but I personally like the woman. Most Americans carry a few extra pounds and are NOT outspoken (too wimpy IMO) so I see her as someone more people should identify with. I'd prefer Paris but half the people wouldn't get it. You could go with one of these or just be lazy and put this.As an aside, this is uglier and bothers me more. I'm pretty sure one single virus packet could take her out. How could you even inoculate her? The needle would go straight through.

What's the name of a virus packet? I don't think it's technically called a cell.