Saturday, July 23, 2005

Armpit Fans

Here I sit, at my desk, trying to clear my mind for some kind of inspiration to hit, some subject worthy of its own blog entry. I pop bing cherries into my mouth and spit out the pits in a little handkerchief next to my keyboard. What to discuss? Children getting raped at Abu Ghraib? Nah. That's too easy. The jokes just write themselves. How 'bout the fact that the second or third most powerful man in our country outed a CIA agent out of political spite and still has the support of folks who tout National Security as something they're serious about? Nah.

What really has me wound up more than anything right now is sweat. I still haven't turned on the air conditioning in my apartment and my body's pissed off. My body's all, "Hey, if you don't want to cool off, I'll make your shirts stink." And then it does. I try and fight it. I hop into the shower to cool off and then, moments later, the heat creeps back.

And now I wish someone would invent armpit fans. I don't know how they would work. I'm not a techy. But they'd clip onto your clothing and provide a steady blast of cool air directly to the parts of your body that require the most cooling off. For the gentlemen, zipper fans would be good as well for the, uh, type of sweat only you guys have.

There's got to be a huge market for this. Superconductor shirts? Someone get on this.

I know there's a lot going on in the world, but until I feel fresh, I can't worry about it.

3 comments:

Quecumber said...

With all of the surgery's they have these days, you can probably get your arm pits removed.

Butternut said...

Er, so why aren't you turning on the A/C? You like the stank?

Should be cooling off a smidge over the next couple days. Oh, strawberries look like they are in season too. Yummy and you can actually get a basket without any fuzzy fungus on the bottom ones.

These guys have lots of ideas to stay cool. Like this one, "There is no better personal air conditioning at any price than: ... a diaper tied from forehead to nape of neck".

http://frugalliving.about.com/library/nct40.htm

Or my personal favorite, "Evaporative heating in its simplest form - wet your t-shirt, wring it out, wear it." Well, it's not really my favorite since I turn ON the A/C. However it's my favorite for Laura. :)

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