Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Vatican to Children: Stay Away from Harry Potter














The Vatican's chief exorcist, Father Gabriele Amorth, wants children to stay away from Harry Potter books. According to Amorth, "By reading Harry Potter a young child will be drawn into magic and from there it is a simple step to Satanism and the Devil."

Or, to put it in a way that college-bound high school students might understand: Harry Potter is to Satanism what Marijuana is to Heroin Addiction. I personally think that Harry Potter is heroin, having been sucked into reading the entire series after innocently popping open the first book over Christmas. And, I hate to admit, I'm looking forward to the release of the next one. Shhhhhh.

That doesn't mean the books aren't dangerous. If the above photo is any indication, they clearly are. The road to evil, it turns out, is clogged with bumper to bumper traffic of the Styrofoam noodle variety. "Look at me, mom! I'm playing QUIDDITCH!!!" No, sweetheart, you're not. Now put that thing back in the pool where it belongs and get mama a butterbeer...I mean, vodka tonic.

4 comments:

Kevekev101 said...

Put the marijuana and Harry Potter books together, and then you've got something.

Matthew said...

That is adorable. You think it would be cool if I ran at kids with a foam noodle tucked between my legs, yelling "I'm Harry Potter!"?

duboisist said...

If that's their position, why didn't the Vatican come out against "The Passion" because kids might start crucifying people?

Mr. Mackey says, "Drugs are bad, mmkay..."

Butternut said...

And water into wine isn't magic?

Jesus saves, and takes half damage.