Fun w/ Rectal Thermometers!

Gotcha! I'm not really going to write about how fun they are. That would be silly.

As mentioned in my lil' questionaire, I took Bean to the vet yesterday to have her checked out. The night I got back into town she fell ill. At first I thought she might be depressed because she stayed at her boyfriend Baxter's house. Apparently she didn't even notice I was gone and spent five glorious days nuzzling with Baxter and running through Baxter's neighborhood with him looking for squirrels and possum. I figured out it was more than depression when she didn't eat her sausage snack. When dogs don't eat treats, it's a problem.

A LITTLE ASIDE
*I must point out that I recognize that pets, like children, are annoying to hear about unless they're your own. I just want you to know that I know that.*
RESUME DULL ACCCOUNT OF MY DOG

When she didn't improve the next day, I made an appointment with the vet. At this point, we still don't know exactly what's wrong with her. Her temperature was 105 degrees. A dog's normal temp is 102.5. So the plan is to give her antibiotics, medication to help her, uh, have better stools, and some homeopathic stuff that does something or other that I can't remember. And I'm to feed her chicken and rice.

So I am now cooking for my dog, and my dog doesn't even want what I'm cooking. It could either be that my cooking sucks, or that she's still too sick to eat. I'd love for it to be the former but I doubt it. And today, on the way back from an audition, I purchased a digital thermometer so I can monitor her temperature. There are three ways to take someone's temperature--under the tongue, in the armpit or rectally--and only one way to take a dog's temperature.

I had the distinct pleasure of asking the woman at the pharmacy if it was okay to put the termometer in a plastic bag if I wanted to take a rectal temperature. According to her, you can purchase little plastic baggies to do so. I didn't find any. Fortunately, they are included in the package.

Just so you know, Bean's temperature is 104.2 today, slightly less than yesterday, but she seems like she's doing worse.

In any case, keep your fingers crossed.

I will try and be more entertaining in the near future. Perhaps I'll invite some sorority girls over and take their temperatures the same way. Then I'll write about it for your reading pleasure. I guarantee at least one person fantasizes about that very subject.

Adieu.