Monday, June 27, 2005

Bride, 90, and groom, 96, marry

It's the heartwarming tale that wasn't. The marriage made headlines in Great Britain. The happy couple met at an old age home and fell in love. He popped the question; she said yes. And so it came about that these two lovebirds became the oldest couple in the world to tie the knot.

Sweet story, huh? Unfortunately, the papers don't tell the true story.

Some claim that Faye Webber stopped taking her birth control to try and get Raymond to marry her. Raymond's kids are calling her a "golddigger" and wonder why she didn't marry someone her own age.

Faye's children insist their mother is not a golddigger, and that Raymond is a cad who hit on every woman in the home for senior living. Furthermore, Faye's children accuse Ray of trying to run their lives. "You can't make me clean my room!" shouted Nigel Webber, an investment banker, at Raymond two weeks ago in Surrey. "You're not my father!" New step-dad Raymond then grounded Nigel for a week, costing the 55-year-old his job.

"These kids need discipline," explained Raymond. "For too long they've run roughshod over Faye. Well, that's not gonna fly anymore. My retiremnt home room, my rules."

Ummmmm....

I couldn't think of anything today.

5 comments:

Vert said...

-laughs- This reminds me of the paraplegic eighty year old everyone has been talking about at work. Apparently, grandpa has
gotten his niagra and gots to get his geriatric swerve on. -thinks- Suddenly, I feel queasy and have no desire to look at Maxim magazine. It sucks having a vivid imagination...eww.

VagabondLoafer said...

Those jazzed up non-corset wearing flappers are always causing trouble. I'd rather court a Gibson girl any day.

santana said...

That was funny. It actually made me laugh at 11:38 p.m. The funniest part was when he grounded the 55 year old kid and he lost his job. They should make a movie about this story, Jack Nicholson would be perfect for the groom.

Antonio Gramsci said...

When they're with their friends, they really mean it when they say "My old man" or "my old lady."

I couldn't think of anything either.

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