Thursday, March 08, 2007

Blades Don't Kill People, People Kill People

The UK government is about to make a huge mistake, even huger than letting the Beckhams emigrate to the U.S. They are going to ban samurai swords because the weapons are deemed "too dangerous". Naturally, the NSA (National Samurai Association) is reeling and people are vowing to to defy the ban with bold statements such as, "You can have my sword after you pry it from my cold, dead hands." Apparently samurai swords are the second favorite weapon of choice for organized gangs, right after guns. Thankfully, the goverment is providing a loophole for geeks. Members of groups such as the To-ken Society of Great Britain and the British Kendo Association will still be permitted to own them.

6 comments:

Pierce said...

Just because there is a group of people using something as a weapon (even if it is a weapon) there is no reason to ban it. I mean come on there are some people out there that use their newborn babies as weapons. Are babies going to be banned next? Seriously have you ever been smacked with an infant, it doesn't feel good.

Tim said...

If predict death by sword stories go berzerk this year. Not sure why - there have already been two I think in the US alone. Actually I could write at length about why I speculate but let's just say THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!

I'm serious though. Watch. Score keeping begins. . .









Now

Tim said...

Actually I want to go on record with this: there should be a show (Like "Dancing with the Stars") called "Celebrity Swordfight". Think about how many actors/actresses have studied swordplay for some role they've had - sometimes at great length. The show would be one part choreographed demonstration and then an actual round where points are scored by touching the opponent with yer blade or severing an appendage.

Brad Pitt vs. Tom Cruise round one. Sure they wouldn't go for it but I'd watch it. Who wouldn't watch this?

duboisist said...

This law gives yakuza assassins an unfair advantage.
I predict either Italy sues because it violates EU free trade agreements or we start reading about Russian journalists dying from mysterious foot-long "paper" cuts

Laura Swisher said...

Excellent point, Pierce. I completely agree. We should ban babies, especially ones with big heads.

Tim said...

http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/breaking-news/ireland/article2350830.ece