Monday, April 20, 2009

Wanted: Investors for Sure-Fire Money-Making Scheme


















With the stock market in the tank, I've come across a once-in-a-lifetime investment opportunity, but I need to act fast, and I need some help with raising the dough. That's where you folks come in. I propose we all go in on becoming co-parents to a media sensation.

We'll love her all equally, and we'll all be responsible for her expenses (acting classes, school, food, clothing, etc.).

I'm working out the details now, but please contact me if you're serious about going in on this.

Yours,
L.

5 comments:

Butternut said...

What a fantastic idea! I have about $100K in cash that I was saving for a new house, but screw that I want this kid! I really need someone with small fingers to do some knitting and sewing. In fact, I have a few hundred thousand cute sweaters that need knitting for next winter and her small fingers are just perfect for the job.

What a great find, Laura. If you can spot the other $100K we should be golden.

Oh crap, this just in. Michael Jackson just out bid us for $1.2 million. Oh well, maybe the Jolie-Pitt's will have a sale soon.

tankboy2902 said...

And we'd have gotten away with it too, except for those meddling kids and their pesky 13th Amendment...

"Z" said...

I heard Madonnas got dibs??

Laura Swisher said...

I can contribute about $1000. IRS sent me a notice saying I owe much money. Jerks.

Danny said...

Dang! I just sent the last of my money to this prince in Nigeria who needed help securing his inheritance. Once he sends me my portion of it I'll be able to contribute.